Doing chores doesn’t have to be a bore! Try these super simple ways to make doing housework a fun way for you and your husband to spend time together.

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Why chores usually suck, especially for busy moms

Let’s be real. No one likes doing chores.

But when you’re are a busy mom who has to manage a family, career, and a home (plus eleventy hundred other things. . . ), doing chores really SUCKS. You have little time or energy, and your to-do list seems to just get longer and longer every day.

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And your husband? Well, he may not be the most helpful guy in the world. Or he is, but only if you nag him to death first about getting stuff done, which probably is putting quite the strain on your relationship.

So not only is housework an overwhelming task in itself, but now you also have to worry about resentment in your marriage on top of it all. Yikes!

Why it doesn’t have to be that way!

I’m here to tell you, mama, that doing chores doesn’t have to be a total suck-fest. There are some things that you can do to turn your chore time into a time that you and your husband can actually enjoy together.

I know it sound far-fetched, but doing housework is actually quite a mindless activity (how much of your brain do you really need to use to wash the dishes?). That makes it a perfect time to talk, sing, and have fun doing other things together!

We will get to the list of ways that you can do this in a minute, but first, let’s address the elephant in the room.

Getting your husband to help more with chores

If your husband is less than motivated to help with the housework, nagging him to help out might push him to get his butt into gear, but it’s also going to drive a wedge into your relationship.

Instead, focus on making chores a fun!

Use things that are naturally more motivational to men, like competition, having fun, and (sorry, but it’s gotta be here) sex to encourage him to help out more.

Would it be nice if he just did things out of the goodness of his heart and you didn’t have to make things more fun for him to want to participate? Yes. But sometimes getting the ball rolling on optimizing your marriage is more important than doing what is fair.

The more you can make doing chores a fun part of your routine together, the more your husband is going to be naturally inclined to help out without persuasion. It’s all part of the process!

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Ways to make doing chores with your husband more fun

But now to the good stuff- the things that you can do to make these dreaded chores a little less dreadful.

1- Gamify doing chores

Turn doing chores into a game for you and your husband to play together!

Race against each other to see who can fold their basket of laundry fastest or who can check off three things on their respective to-do lists first. This sense of competition and urgency will make you get those chores done super quick and have fun in the meantime!

Or, instead of playing against each other, try setting a timer and working together against the clock to get your chores done quickly. Encourage your sense of teamwork and blast through that to-do list.

Make your games even more interesting by setting bets beforehand about incentives that you’ll get if you win – either individually or as a team.

Examples of prizes that the winner of the chore race gets:

• A 5 minute massage from the losing partner
• The rights to pick the movie you watch together that night
• An extra 10 minutes of sleep-in time on the weekend while the losing partner takes the kids

Examples of prizes when you both beat the clock together:

• You can have desert
• You can put money in a jar towards something you’ve been saving up for
• You can have TV time (but are stuck with books for the evening if you don’t get the chores done on time!)

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2- Chore time as your dedicated catch-up time

Doing chores together can be a great time for you and your husband to catch up at the end of the day. Use the time to unwind and talk about your days as you tidy up the kitchen together or fold the laundry.

Turn up the dial on the fun during your chore time catch-up by making this time your time to chat about fun topics!

Use weird and random conversation starters to kick off a unique discussion while you work.

Would you rather have a very obviously fake orange tan or be extremely pale white? If you were chosen to be one the first families to move to a new civilization on Mars for free, would you go? What animal would you want to talk to first if you could talk to animals?

Suddenly your chore chat time becomes a time for you both to really let loose, get laughing, and having fun!

Find more fun conversation inspiration to get the conversation flowing.

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3- Do your chores in the nude

Hear me out – somehow doing chores naked is just more fun.

After the kids go to bed, strip it off and get to work!

There’s something exciting about the thrill of walking around naked, even from the comfort of your own home. And when your husband is vacuuming the floors or washing dishes in the buff, it just makes everything a little more silly!

Silly, and maybe a little sexy. Doing your chores naked also opens up a natural opportunity for intimacy during your chores (a slap on the butt here or a side eye check out there) and after (move it into the bedroom).

This one may quickly become your husband’s favorite (since his parenting love language is sex, after all). But if it encourages him to help get the housework done so you have less stress (since your parenting love language is domestic help)? It’s a win win!

PS – If going full naked is a little too far out of your comfort zones, keep your underwear on for a similar effect.

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4- Chores time as your DJ dance party time

Make a playlist you both love with all of your favorite hits. Then break that puppy out when it’s time to do your chores!

If you both enjoy music, you can use your chore time to get in the groove and sing along. Use your amazing singing voice (I know we all have one) to belt out along with the music, or take a minute between tasks to dance it out together with your husband.

Mix up your music genres from evening to evening to keep things interesting. Monday evenings can be 80’s pop hits and bathroom cleaning, while Tuesdays are your favorite party hits from the 2010s while you fold laundry.

Take turns finding new playlists to hear or make it a fun common interest for you both to make your own amazing playlists together.

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5- Start a book club while you work

If both you and your husband enjoy reading but don’t seem to have much time after having kids, try turning your chore time into book club time.

Pick an audiobook you both are interested in reading/hearing. Then, after the kids go to bed in the evening, agree that you will tidy up and clean for the duration of one chapter of the book.

You can either play the book on a speaker for you both to hear at the same time, or wear a pair of headphones each and go about your chores.

When the chapter is done, so is your chore time! Get together and spend a few minutes talking about your favorite parts of the chapter or what you learned. This is a great way to connect and share a hobby together while also getting sh*t done!

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6- Challenge each other with enticing rewards

If there’s something you would really like your husband to do around the house but you can’t motivate him to help out, try offering a reward.

It may sound a little like having to train a dog, but offering a reward that he wants is great motivation to get him involved without you having to nag (which will inevitably damage your relationship).

You could offer to make his favorite meal if he cleans out the gutters, or offer that you will tackle a different dreaded chore if does his, taking something else off of his plate.

And, the mother of all rewards for men, you could also offer up a little sexy time in exchange for him helping out with some of the household chores. I’m sorry to say it, ladies, but it’s an EXCELLENT motivator! Remember, your husband’s parenting love language is sex, and yours is domestic help, so you both benefit from this approach in getting what you need.

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7- Use your brain during your mindless cleaning

Doing chores usually doesn’t require much mental stimulation, but you and your husband can turn it into a fun time to play some brain games!

Try these ideas:

• Shout out some 4th grade level math equations to each other while you tidy up. What’s 13 times 3?! Fifty-four divided by 9?!
• Give each other words to spell spelling-bee style. Comradery! C-o-m-r-a-d-e-r-y. Comradery. (Could you use it in a sentence?)
• Start a list and see how many things you can add to the list without repeating what your partner has already said. Name all of the dog breeds you can think of. Fast food chains. Makes of cars.
• Ask each other trivia questions! Make them up on your own with all of the fun facts swimming around in your head, print off a list of questions, or invest in a game with trivia questions, like I Should Have Known That.
• Did you know that you can play Jeopardy on your Alexa devices? Just ask Alexa to play Jeopardy and you can get 5 Jeopardy questions (and a bonus extra question) every day!

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Chores don’t have to be a bore

Doing chores together with your husband doesn’t have to be a dreaded activity for either of you. By making your chore time into a dedicated time for you to spend connecting with one another, you can begin to get things done around your house without it being such a burden.

Try using a blend of all of the suggestions on the list above and keep your chore time interesting. Remember to be creative and, most importantly, have fun!

Let’s get cleaning!

Are you ready, mama?

Don’t spend another day waiting for your marriage to magically get better as your kids grow older and you and your husband grow further apart. Take charge of your life and get the marriage you want and deserve.

Start having more fun with your chores today!

This article is part of the series How to Revive Your Marriage After Kids Fundamental 2: Have More Fun.

About me

Hi, I’m Bailee! I am a mom just like you who, after having my second baby, was struggling BIG TIME to cope with motherhood and marriage. Divorce seemed like the inevitable option until I decided to fight for the family life that I truly wanted.

I challenged my husband to give our marriage one more go and was able to pull us out of the abyss. With a change in my mindset and some other handy tools and tricks along the way, I brought us back into the light of a happy marriage with kids.

Now I am here now to help you do the same! Are you ready, mama? Learn more.